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The speech you deserved:

Hey, you should already know this, but you have always meant a lot to me. From day one I knew there was more to you than met the eye. I found myself wanting to explore that side of you, the side you hid from everyone else. One night out on the town and you had me singing. No one does that. You showed me some of your spoken word and I was breathtaken. Your depth and understanding only manifests from someone who has made it out of hell and knows better than looking back. The next time we adventured, I was so comfortable, I let my guard down. I fell asleep in your arms and it was so pure and untainted. I didn’t want you for myself, I was just honored that you let me in passed your walls that you built so high. In the end things got messy and you saw me differently. I saw me differently too. Now I’m sure you could care less, but I’m genuinely happy to see you so excited for what’s ahead. You’re one of the few golden children of adversity and you’ll never understand my appreciation for the guy I got to call a friend; even just for that short time. After everything, I’m glad I got to see you happy. I wish you well in all that you do. Goodbye J.

0 notes / 7 months ago / reblog

Unless that was Pablo.. in which case, we can’t talk. Sorry. So bye.

0 notes / 8 months ago / reblog

Anonymous said: I saw you and your smile skating down the street about a week ago, glad to see you still wear it wonderfully. I hope life is treating you well and you're accomplishing all the things you've set your mind to. We haven't spoke in what seems like an eternity, but just know I'm always wishing you the best, even if the notion isn't reciprocated. You're one of the special ones, kid. Don't ever forget that.

Thanks Brandon. I hope you’re doing well, I really do.

0 notes / 8 months ago / reblog

Anonymous said: You're really convinced that that is the reason? It's one thing to portray an individual you want us to see and respect, it's another when your actions from a distance are the complete opposite from it. Luckily, you can use your age as an excuse. I just hope that you realize your hypocrisy as you get older

What the eff is this referring to? If it’s toward the judgement post I’m not taking back anything I said. I’ve never claimed to be a saint, in fact I know that I am far from it. I don’t see how that warrants hatred toward my honesty though? I’ve messed up big time (once in particular) recently, but that is between me and the person involved. Judge me and call me a hypocrite all you want, but if you had the balls to just ask me flat out what it is you think I’m trying to hide, I’d tell the truth. The one thing I’ve always strived to be in my lifed is truthful. So here I am Anon, arms open wide and vulnerable; ask me what you will.

0 notes / 8 months ago / reblog

I’ve been so judged recently, and for what? For giving someone a second chance? I’m not weak or naïve by any means, but somehow by allowing someone to explain their side of a story and own up to their faults is being dumb? Excuse me for being a humanist with an open mind and loving heart. I didn’t realize that was illegal and offered open grounds for persecution. I was just following my natural instinct. But if being willing to face adversity is the wrong thing to do, then by all means, judge away! I’d rather be wrong for the rest of my life than be half as ignorant as the people judging me right now.

0 notes / 8 months ago / reblog
4222 notes

I’d hate for you to pass up an opportunity with me. So if I present it to you and you know it’s there, you’d better take it and run like hell; do it before it’s gone forever. God only knows how hard second chances are to come by.

2 notes / 9 months ago / reblog
Dearest Anon,

You are right. Every time someone wants to get to know me, even if their intentions are pure, something along the way distracts them and they aim toward something less fulfilling than my actual being that they were attracted to in the first place. It’s something I’ve grown rather used to by now, but you have been refreshing. Resistance and self control play a big role in a friendship with me apparently. For that I wanted to thank you. Talk to you soon. -AJ

0 notes / 10 months ago / reblog

Anonymous said: Many have failed you so guarded is necessary. I'm not going to compliment every trait you have acquired, you know this about yourself already and it's not like it hasn't been sung to you by the same birds. This isn't suppose to make sense now but when it does, just know that you deserve to be happy if not happy already :)

You’re totally right though, I keep people at bay, not because I not comfortable, but because they do not honestly care enough to find the questions that really matter. I don’t mind my solitude; it is, after all, completely within my power to change. The princess inside every girl wants her companion of course, but this busy bee is also very patient, so I can say that I’m happy. I’ve accomplished a lot for someone of my age and I know my own self worth and I am proud of who I am. Thank you for the well wishes and honest compliment toward my character. I’m honestly flattered. Have a stellar day, Anon ✌

0 notes / 10 months ago / reblog

Anonymous said: Complexity of an individual isn't difficult to understand. One needs to only ask the right questions. You've been ask every cliche question there is yet no one has actually asked you,"How are you doing?". No one has really cared enough to listen to the little things. Those things are what matter. Motives and intentions always get in the way when getting to know you. That's why you may have individuals at arms length.

Even if someone does care, I don’t necessarily let them in. I’m honest and straight forward, but vulnerability is the only side of me that takes time to see. Being strong can only get you so far, before you realize that being strong isn’t always being independent or knowing what to do when shit hits the fan. It’s being brave enough to be vulnerable when you’ve been taken advantage of in that state in the past. But who must you be, to take the time to analyze me in such a way? I appreciate the time, kind stranger.

0 notes / 10 months ago / reblog

I heal slowly, love thoroughly, and fall quickly.

All that’s left now is something to cause the initial trip.

1 notes / 10 months ago / reblog

My naïve heart wants to dive head first into your shallow arms.

0 notes / 10 months ago / reblog

Trinity is starting to just turn into me. She bought a bunch of clothes that are practically identical to mine.

1 notes / 11 months ago / reblog

I don’t know what to say. You started writing that song for me when you were with me and ended it for her. I don’t want you, but it still hurts to know that not even that is sacred enough to just be mine. I have to share everything with the other girls and I never was appreciated fully on my own. It just kind of sucks to be reminded of that with such a beautiful song. Congrats, I guess.

0 notes / 11 months ago / reblog
Kelp beds in the sunlight ♡